What a milestone the first day of school is. All at once it feels like the end of an era and the start of a brand-new adventure. Playgrounds across the country will be filled with laughter, tears, excitement, nerves, and anticipation from parents and children alike. As a mum who has waved off two very different little girls on their first day, I understand the conflicting emotions it invokes. Here are a few tips to prepare you both for the first day. 

1. You matter

Day one of school is all about the beautiful child you have raised. It's their big day, their moment in the spotlight and the first step on their journey to independence. But it's also a huge moment for you. Whether your son or daughter has been at nursery full time or at home with you since day one, sending them to school is a big change. Be kind to yourself. Take some time after dropping them off to enjoy a hot drink and work through your emotions. Worrying about them is normal and healthy. One day, dropping them off at school will be the norm. Until then, give yourself a break. 

2. Be positive

However you feel deep down, it's important to be positive in front of your child. Of course, they should know that you'll miss them. But they don't need to know that mummy will be sad at home without them. These little people of ours are sponges and mirrors, soaking up all our emotions and reflecting them back when we least expect it. Even the most anxious child will benefit from hearing about the wonderful aspects of school life. I told my girls all about the friend I started school with who remains one of my favourite people. Despite living on opposite sides of the world, we stay in touch regularly and meet up when we can. My girls still ask after her when they're seeking reassurance about friendships enduring. 

3.Recognise the opportunity for you both

Accepting your own emotions comes with the headspace to realise the wonderful things that can come from your child starting school. Their first step towards independence. Learning to read and write, expanding their world and meeting new people. As parents, our own worlds become a little wider too. Friendship circles naturally shrink as we get older and making friends is tough. But your little person still has the childlike confidence to stroll over to a friendly looking peer and ask them to be best friends. They're pretty good judges of character too. Inevitably you'll get chatting to the parents and your own social group will expand alongside theirs. 

4. Remember that they will always need you

When my eldest started school, my biggest fear was that the day she wouldn't need me was creeping up on me. She was such an independent little soul anyway. Watching her walk off in her line, chatting to new friends without a glance back at me was heartbreaking. But five years on, I can look back fondly on that day. It was the beginning of her strong, fierce, funny character developing. Watching her grow and change has been a pleasure and of course, she still needs me, albeit in different ways.  

5. Prepare for restraint collapse 

After-school restraint collapse is the technical term for the tears and tantrums when children return to their place of safety. All day long, they've done as they were told, concentrated on learning and tried to control their emotions. Once home to you, they feel safe to open up. It's not a sign that they've had a bad day or they're not coping with school. After-school restraint collapse is another sign that they need you, love you, and feel safest when you're there. Because even in the face of this huge, exciting change, being with family will always be their safety net.